Karen Hollis | February 9, 2025
Epiphany 5/Thecla 5
Fifth Stage of Spiritual Transformation:
The stages of spiritual transformation begin with a bright light of insight coming straight at us. In the second stage, we receive that insight and find a path within us to the possibility that light represents. When the path becomes clear, we see the open door before us, and with courage, we walk through. On the other side of the door, we find ourselves on a pilgrimage that tests our readiness to embrace this new way of seeing.
As theologian Meggan Watterson says, if we survive the test of readiness, here in the fifth stage, we are presented with a choice point . . . to either return to the old life . . . or die to the old life and become something new. This stage is arguably the most challenging. This is the place on the journey where many of us choose not to continue. While we may have outgrown the old way or discovered that our previous strategies for navigating life aren’t serving us anymore, they are still what we know . . . and that can be more appealing than moving forward into the unknown.
Spiritual transformation is not easy . . . it is an invitation, not a requirement. It is a process that brings us face to face with ourselves, our own truth, whatever it may be . . . and it is perhaps at these choice points that we are most aware of God’s presence.
We continue along this path when we are ready – not before then, and probably still with fear and courage as companions. When we are done with the old patterns, tired of the view from the plateau or circling round and round in the eddy, continuing along this path means returning is no longer possible. Continuing also allows us to release what we no longer need, like techniques for relating to people or belief systems – at one time they helped us navigate our world, even helped us to survive. So, we thank them and let them go. We can release what no longer serves us . . . and receive inner resources that will support our journey forward.
After doing so, we might feel relieved, or grief, certainly lighter . . . and perhaps even hungry. Doing this kind of work often makes me hungry! (I could eat like 3 or 4 potatoes) Eating even helps to ground us in our bodies when we do big things . . . our physicality is undeniable when we are eating.
Here in the fifth stage, I think about siesta, a rest in the shade, to bring in light and shadow again. While the sunshiny day is still out there, we give ourselves a minute in the shade of the open tomb to rest and be restored, take in some sustenance, and continue along the path.
We will move into stage 6 next week with new inner resources; we lean on them for support as we navigate our new circumstances and learn to belong to ourselves. And finally, in stage 7, we return to the place where the call first came.
(breath)
Stage 5 is a narrow passage. Before we hear our scripture stories, let’s remain here for just a moment more and fill the narrow passage with a bit of silence. I invite us to fill this passageway with breath . . . releasing and receiving. Let’s release with each breath out and receive with each breath in.
Scripture Readings
Thecla 22:1-4, 25:1-6 And when she looked into the face of the crowd, she saw the Lord sitting there in Paul’s form and said, “As if I were not able to endure, Paul has come to see me.” And she looked intently at him; but he departed into heaven. And the young men and young women brought firewood and straw so that Thecla might be burned. And as she came naked, the governor wept and marveled at the power in her. And the executioners laid out the firewood and ordered her to climb upon the pyre. And when she made the sign of the cross, she climbed upon the firewood. They lit it and a great fire blazed, but the fire did not touch her. For God, having compassion, caused a sound under the earth, and a cloud, filled with rain and hail, darkened the sky from above, and the vessel poured forth all that was in it. Many were in danger and died, and the fire was extinguished. And Thecla was saved.
And there was much love in the tomb, Paul rejoicing, and Onesiphorus and all of them. And they had five loaves and vegetables and water and salt, and rejoiced at the divine works of Christ. And Thecla said to Paul, “I will cut my hair short and follow you wherever you go.” But he said, “It is a shameful time and you are fair. May no other trial come upon you worse than the first, and this time you are not able [to] stand firm but are cowardly.” And Thecla said, “Only give me the seal of Christ and no trial will touch me.” And Paul said to Thecla, “Have patience, and you will receive the water.”
John 6:5-13 When he looked up and saw a large crowd coming towards him, Jesus said to Philip, ‘Where are we to buy bread for these people to eat?’ He said this to test him, for he himself knew what he was going to do. Philip answered him, ‘Six months’ wages would not buy enough bread for each of them to get a little.’ One of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter’s brother, said to him, ‘There is a boy here who has five barley loaves and two fish. But what are they among so many people?’ Jesus said, ‘Make the people sit down.’ Now there was a great deal of grass in the place; so they sat down, about five thousand in all. Then Jesus took the loaves, and when he had given thanks, he distributed them to those who were seated; so also the fish, as much as they wanted. When they were satisfied, he told his disciples, ‘Gather up the fragments left over, so that nothing may be lost.’ So they gathered them up, and from the fragments of the five barley loaves, left by those who had eaten, they filled twelve baskets.
Reflection:
May the words of my mouth and the meditations of all our hearts be reflections of your word to us today, in Christ’s name we pray. Amen
The stages of spiritual transformation lead us into this tight passage today, so I invite us to center ourselves for the remainder of the service around table fellowship. Many of the stories told over and over again about Jesus or by Jesus have to do with eating together. It is a way of affirming someone’s humanity, celebrating friendship, opening people to the power of God. As I said earlier, eating is a way of getting into our bodies and it is a holy thing to share that with others.
Thecla’s road to the table is a long one this morning. I’m going to talk us through the story since its new to us and so rich in symbolism.
Paul has been thrown out of the city and as Thecla is being escorted to the pyre, she looks for him in the crowd for reassurance. Christ appears in the crowd, not in the likeness of Jesus, but in that of Paul, the one Thecla seeks, the one with whom she has made a connection. It’s so beautiful. For me, it’s an example of how personally and specifically God loves each of us. Christ meets her where she is, in her need, and shows her that – whether or not Paul is physically present – she is not alone.
When Thecla is at her most exposed, when she has divested of every outer identity, every role, every person who used to be in her life – even her peers are gathering wood for the fire – when she is squeezed into this narrow passage and all that remains is the truth within her, the love of Christ meets her gaze and affirms her.1
The governor is watching her as she walks toward the theatre . . . this is a man who has every privilege and power this world has to offer. He is educated, wealthy, he is male, he has a powerful role, and he sees something in her he has never seen – vulnerability. So often it is interpreted as weakness – but true vulnerability is the willingness to be seen, and in Thecla, he recognizes that it is more powerful than anything humans can bestow.
There is more high drama in the telling of Thecla’s story as she makes the sign of the cross, and knowing she cannot go back, climbs onto the pyre . . . remarkably, the flames do not touch her. God sends a violent storm and a commotion on the ground, many people die, and Thecla is saved.
The governor gives her a robe to wear and lets her go. Thecla wanders out of town and happens to run into her neighbour, Onesiphorus’ son, who was sent to buy food. All this time Paul, Onesiphorus, and his household have been fasting and praying in an open tomb outside Iconium, but the children finally get hungry – as children do – so Paul sends one of them to get some food. He returns also with Thecla and they all have a joyful reunion.
The image of the open tomb is like a neon arrow pointing us toward Jesus’ empty tomb – for death could not hold him, our tradition proclaims. Thecla enters into what could very easily have been for her a closed tomb. She has died to who she was and now claims for herself a new path, a new life.
In the end, the open tomb, the empty tomb, is not empty at all, rather it is full of joy, wonder, and life. Everyone is hungry. They assess the food the child has retrieved: five loaves and vegetables and water and salt . . . sounds like a soup and bun lunch! They cook, eat, and rejoice. Here in the shade of the open tomb, Thecla has a moment to take a breath, take in some sustenance, and share table fellowship. After the meal, she has some time to talk with Paul about the next steps on the path she has chosen.
She’s ready to cut her hair short, get baptized, and follow Paul.
I first studied this text last year in Queer Bible Study with some of the people here today. We learned together that the people in early Christian communities were challenging gender norms. For example, in the first century, short hair was for men, it emphasized their intellect, while long hair was for women. On her way into Christian community, Thecla is so ready to embody a space that challenges the norms that have confined her – she is also an example for everyone who reads this story who feels constricted by the societal expectations around their gender.
While he is genuinely grateful she has made it this far, Paul cautions her. He is walking that fine line of appearing supportive without actually helping her. He says: “It is a shameful time and you are fair. May no other trial come upon you worse than the first, and this time you are not able [to] stand firm but are cowardly.” I like to think that his heart is in the right place, that he is concerned for her wellbeing in a very dangerous world. He is worried that the world is not ready for her, and indeed they are not. More importantly, I wonder if Paul isn’t ready for her . . . whether he isn’t ready for a colleague, an equal. It wouldn’t shock me.
As others have said before me, while Paul’s resistance to Thecla’s baptism is unfortunate, it can be seen as a part of a greater divine timing. There is more drama to unfold and more opportunity for Thecla to claim herself and grow into herself. She knows her purpose, knows her calling, and she is ready.
1 Meggan Watterson, House of Mary Magdalene gathering, March 3, 2024