Karen Hollis | May 7, 2023 6th Sunday
Loneliness and connection
Psalm 31:1-5, 15-16
In you, O LORD, I seek refuge; do not let me ever be put to shame; in your righteousness deliver me.
Incline your ear to me; rescue me speedily.
Be a rock of refuge for me, a strong fortress to save me. You are indeed my rock and my fortress; for your name's sake lead me and guide me, take me out of the net that is hidden for me, for you are my refuge.
Into your hand I commit my spirit; you have redeemed me, O LORD, faithful God.
My times are in your hand; deliver me from the hand of my enemies and persecutors. Let your face shine upon your servant; save me in your steadfast love.
Reading: Richard Wagamese from Embers
Me: Sometimes, when things are hardest, it feels like Creator’s not listening.
Old woman: Creator can do whatever Creator chooses. When we are in doubt or confusion or fear, She
could send us thunderbolts or lightening or a huge pile of unexpected cash. But most of the time,
she sends people. People are the miracles that emerge from the ripped and worn patterns of your
life and help you stitch it back together. You learn to see the pattern better then.
May the words of my mouth and the meditations of all our hearts be reflections of your word to us
today, in Christ’s name we pray. Amen
In the news on Friday I heard that the World Health Organization declared the pandemic no longer a global emergency . . . this comes after Bonnie Henry lifted mandatory mask wearing in medical facilities a month ago. Since arriving here in Comox in January, I’ve seen fewer and fewer people wearing masks . . . and gradually stopped wearing my own. For many, life has returned to fullness . . . people are gathering, taking trips again, seeing family, though not all of us.
For 3 years we had to be so careful about spending time together. We negotiated needs and comfort levels, tried zoom, even if we didn’t reach proficiency, and tried to converse through masks even when our hearing made it all but impossible. Some of us opted to stay home – I certainly made that choice sometimes. And we’ve been sick – I’ve had it, many of you have too – and I know some who are still feeling the effects. Over the past 3 years we have prayed like the psalmist, God protect us, protect everyone . . . incline your ear to us and rescue us quickly.
The emergency has now been declared over . . . and where does that leave us? I invite you to check in with yourself for a moment . . . how are you? No really, how are you? There is a part of me still standing stunned, wondering what just happened, quite puzzled about how time works.
I remember when we started holding hybrid services on Gabriola, we were still in the thick of negotiating comfort levels around distancing and masking, and were solving problems we’d never had to think about before. I realized I needed to take my introvert out of her comfortable little box and challenge her to engage in the world again. There was a part of me who didn’t remember how conversations work with people I don’t know well.Is it like riding a bike? Will I find something to say? There were a few pretty awkward coffee shop interactions and times where I just avoided conversation altogether. I had to exercise that muscle – wobbly at first – until I could rely on it.
I was fortunate to live with another person, so we got through it together . . . the last 3 years were a lot harder for many people who live alone. With necessary isolation came a rise in loneliness. I don’t have 2023 statistics for Canada, but the US Surgeon General just released a report saying that about half of people in the US have experienced loneliness . . . I would guess the figure is similar in this country. Surgeon General Dr. Murthy says, “We now know that loneliness is a common feeling that many people experience. It’s like hunger or thirst. It’s a feeling the body sends us when something we need for survival is missing . . . Loneliness is a serious health concern . . . similar to smoking a pack of cigarettes a day . . . millions of people . . . are struggling in the shadows, and that’s not right.”1
Into this context the psalmist and Richard Wagamese speak this morning. Both of their voices speak of reaching out to God during a challenging time, a critical time, even . . . their words complement and nuance each other, declaring God is God and we cannot predict at any time how they will show up in our lives . . . but we know God . . . and while there may not be a one-to-one correlation between our prayer and God’s response . . . we know there will be one. I love this Old Woman who is a wise one in Wagamese’s writing . . . “people.” she says, often Creator responds by sending people.Yeah . . . I resonate with that, how about you? Creator sends people . . . who are kind, who see you, strangers who say the exact thing you needed to hear, professionals who give excellent care for your loved ones, people who know you and love you in just the way you need. People are miracles or angels who bring the message from God that you are loved and surrounded by love.
Connecting with people and offering kindness and community . . . this is kind of the church’s thing. Jesus teaches us to invite, include, connect with and care for each other. I remember when I first moved to Canada and attended my first Presbytery meeting. Former moderator of the United Church, Peter Short, was the guest speaker. When we moved from our meeting space into our worship space, I sat down in an empty pew and along comes Peter Short, asking if he can sit with me. “Yes, of course,” I managed to say. I immediately felt brought into the fold.
A few people in our neighbourhood gatherings shared that they so appreciated being able to gather with a small group as a gentle way of re-engaging with the church. In another gathering, before I even arrived, a need was identified within the group and individuals offered to help. Right here in our midst, community is happening, the Holy Spirit is at work in people. And I’m grateful, because it can feel risky to reach out and make the connection again . . . and some of us may be lingering here on the edges, unsure how to enter in, weighing choices, and wondering if our church muscle still works. Others of us may be eager for our community to grow in meaningful connections, particularly after the challenges of the past few years, and are actively looking for gentle ways to invite.
I pray that the Holy Spirit will continue to use us in all ways that are helpful toward our collective desire for connection in community. Perhaps we will notice in the coming weeks when we can be the messenger . . . and acknowledge to ourselves, and God too, when we need to encounter one. God is surely working here to stitch our community together in a new way . . . connection by connection.
1 https://www.pbs.org/newshour/health/loneliness-poses-health-risks-as-deadly-as-smoking-u-s-surgeon-general-says May 6, 2023